Lost In Translation

I had a dream last night.

We were happy. There wasn't a care in the world for anything else but what we had, and all we had was us. A wooden house stood still in front of an endless beach. And nothing else could be seen. But us.

We'd meet there, from wherever it is we came from, everyday. All day. From season to season, we'd see a different shade in the sky. And there, we'd just bask in this life that we had.

We'd run across the sand, soak our feet and watch the foams accumulate as the waves gush through our toes. We'd talk about life, sing about love, and we'd laugh.

I remember clearly I had a habit. From time to time, I'd bring a book with me - usually heavy ones. I would place this book in the sand within reach from the incoming waves, and let the waves rush in soaking up the book. I would then put it up to dry and when that had happened, the cover and pages of the books would become wavey, coloured, and textured. I would let the dirt seep in through the pages and leave it untouched. Sometimes we'd start to panic as the books get carried away into the sea as the waves withdraw. Everyone would then suddenly end up running into the waters, diving to save my books.

From encyclopedias to journals to Bibles. I'd do them all.

Last night I had a dream of heaven. My heaven, at least.

And you were there.

I'm sorry for my absence. Yet again.
I've been trying to find the words, but nothing ever suffices to really express what I want to say. There's a lot clogged up inside right now, and it's quite a mess, to be honest. Everything around me is flying everywhere. I want rest, and although they tell me that I can find rest, it's a different sort of rest that I'm after.

I guess I've become an escape-addict. And my weekend away didn't help. It felt like but a tease of what it'd be like to just run away from this place right now to go back to comfort, only to be zipped back to reality in an instant and the congestion starts over again, with even more stuff to pick up.

But tonight, I'm ready to run away. Drive as far out as possible into the night and wake up in a different town and never come back.
Life, as much as I'm trying to simplify it at the moment, is complicated right now.
I'm learning a lot in a short period of time, I'm scaring myself.

Sometimes I just want to be comfortable.
I miss comfortable.

I'm sorry.

That if you just take one step back away from this screen, look to the right at my archives list, and scroll up and down multiple times quickly, the list would look like waves.

~

I wish you smiled more.

I think mum's gonna kill me. That ironing board wasn't cheap, if I remembered correctly. It's bloody thick and heavy.
I think I need to start running again soon.

~

I finally watched Mukhsin tonight.

I'm glad I did. A friend was back in Malaysia not too long ago, and I managed to get her to buy it for me while she was there. So tonight, I had a potluck dinner at my place followed by the movie.

It's good to relax around friends again. I've been so caught up with so much 'work' all week long, I've barely had time to rest and have some 'me' time. Having some people over for dinner and movie was simply refreshing, especially since there were a few whom I haven't caught up with for a while.
Noise. Constant chatter. Laughs. Intertwining topics.
I was 'home'.

The movie was beautiful. Coupled with a dreamy soundtrack; I think it'll make my top ten. Its premise was simple and sweet. A kampung version of My Girl would be the bluntest but most effective way to describe it, I imagine. But I found this one more appealing for a couple of reasons. It was much more mature for one and it was, well, Malaysian. Little things from the fashion to the cars were just sentimental. It also had several indirect reflections to Sepet, the first of the 'trilogy', making the movie much more interesting. As for the story and the matter of 'love' itself, Ant has written about that pretty damn well himself, and I couldn't have described it any better. So I guess I won't go there.

My mid-semester holidays are here. Yay.
Some rest is needed. But at the same time, there's a lot of uni work to catch up on as well.

Oh well.
(whispers: beaches, here i come!)

come,
let's sing and dance in the dark
we'll find our steps with what little illumination the fireflies have to offer.
let the crickets sing our tune, the grass be our ballroom,
the breeze will sweep us off our feet.
the moon will rest among the twirling stars;
our disco ball in outer space.

your laughter will guide me to you
and you'll slowly find your hand in mine.

there's no one here but us
a waltz under His watch;
a love under His breath.

i won't take my eyes off you.

Oh, what a holiday so far.
It's such rush of adrenaline, I tell you. Have barely spent any time at home, and I can tell by the way the house looks - Neat when I'm around, not when I'm away.
But I've been enjoying every bit of it, I must admit. Aside the rushing to finish my Investments assignment due yesterday where I stayed up working on it all night, resulting with only 3 hours of sleep before WHAT IS, I think I'm really loving the holiday so far.

On Wednesday for instance, a bunch of us spent the arvo driving around the city to do a photoshoot for a uni project. Our models were to dress up in the styles of five different music genres from R&B to Goth to Rave. It was simply hilarious watching Beth and Jon don the different costumes, especially since some are just not them. Some of the photos turned out pretty.

I so far have another two (one each of Beth and Jon) more on here. Given the permission, I'll try and post a few more soon.

Last night, PlanetUNI held WHAT IS. That alone is worthy of a couple of entries.
The last two months of running about like a bee led up to last night and it wasn't a letdown at all. The event's capacity was of 700 (I think) but we blew that well. We prayed and fasted for 50 responses and that came through as well. The programs lined up were brilliant from the games to the message - you should've been there. Unless you were, that is. Everyone loved it (as far as I know)! Especially the kid who won the Wii. I mean... he was loving it.
I can't wait for the next event...

~

I've got one more week till uni starts again, and this week has sped on by so quickly.
Oh God, won't you expand space and time?
(Oh yea, Heroes restart on Monday).