Lost In Translation

Dear you,

Hey. It's been a while, hasn't it? Since we sat down with just a table between us. That drink you'd have. That other drink I'd have. I'd insist on paying.

I wonder how you're doing. I see you from time to time at the corner of my eye. I know we throw a few "hi's" and smiles once in a while, but we both know that's pretty pathetic now. I apologise. I know I owe you more. We're never called to live by circumstances. We have the power to rise above it all. But just how convenient could it be to make excuses out of it, hey? That's why we barely know each other anymore, I suppose. Excuses.

Which is why I'm writing you this. You know me. I try my best to cut to the chase.
How are you? What's been going on for the past month or so? Has work been treating you well? It's funny how time flies in such scenarios. The busyness of it all takes over and before you know it, we're strangers now. Let's change that though. I'm making it a point to pause. To climb atop a mountain and not have to immediately think of how to get down. I want to stay up there for a bit and soak in the view. To rest. You up for it?

A lot has been racing through my mind lately. Uni is starting again. Thankfully, I only have 2 days a week. I tried to squeeze it all into one. Unfortunately, one of the lectures was only held on that one day. So I now have five hours on one day and one on another. It's still good. I have three days off and for now, I'll still be working at the cafe during those three days. I'm beginning to feel unsettled there though, and am looking for a better (paying) job. Probably something more aligned to my course as well. It'd be great if I could find a part-time Accounting or Finance job during those three days. I've applied for a few but to no avail so far. I'm still pressing in for more.

Did I tell you? I'm thinking of traveling a bit this year. Something I've never quite done before by myself. That's right. I'm thinking of exploring certain bits of Europe if I can, by myself. Sure there'll be friends there. I'm excited to meet Syikin in France, and perhaps some of my old classmates in London as well. That's if I've got the funds, that is. So far, to equip myself for the trip, I've bought an Eastern European phrasebook and a travel guide on France. Both by Lonely Planet. Awesome stuff. I can so far introduce myself in three languages now. I think. But let's not get too excited. Like I said, it's only if I've got the funds.

So, enough of me, and coming back to you. How's work? I hope the environment's been good. As interesting as work can be, I reckon if the people you work with are simply crap, everything goes out the window. Well, maybe not everything, but a whole lot definitely. A good environment and team helps heaps. Hence, I pray you're making good friends there.
How's life? I've been praying for you. Yes, I actually have. Not particularly for anything, I admit; but definitely for favour, at least, showered on you. The last time we spoke, I remember you mentioning a couple of rough patches in the garden. How's that coming along? I hope all is better on that side of your world.

I think it's high time we catch up.
Enough of this. Let's bring back the table and chairs, the paper cups, and that jazz between us. Let's take away this distance. I know writing is good, but 'good' may just not cut it for this one. I know we have a lot to talk about. But only if you can/want to, of course. I know it may be hard. But let's try.

You know how to get me.

Missing you,
me

He was quiet.

Didn't talk much throughout the night at all. His teeth would surprise you when he occasionally beams (no pun intended) through that thick beard in response to the crowd. And one liners or tiny gestures were all he needed to charm or tickle them too.

The stage was small. And so the crowded instruments didn't help but made it look like a budget orchestra.
It was dimly lit.
Until three wires lowered themselves from the ceiling with light globes on them and glowed warmly.

And there, under those light bulbs, he sang.

"Please, remember me..."

Last night, I went to sleep craving for (in no particular order):
1) Roti canai at Devi's Corner.
2) Kaya toast at the railway station.
3) Diluted Neslo at Murni's in SS2.
4) Overpriced Starbucks' Caramel Macchiatto at Mont Kiara.
5) Some DVD's from my favourite shop in Hartamas.
6) Delicious' Choc Brownie.
7) Hainanese Chicken Rice at the the shop at the back of my house.
8) Bah Kut Teh by the river.
9) Packeted Nasi Lemak's at the railway station (again).
10) Half-boiled eggs at the railway station (yet again).

Sigh.
If only I wasn't watching my diet...

I'm losing sight of a lot.
I know, I know. Learning to take on more includes learning to manage my time better. I'm supposed to be able to make time for more with better management. But I guess I'm not there yet.

And hence comes to complains.
I never call back. I tell lies about catching up soon. I'm growing eye bags. I'm back to at least two coffees a day. My parents are here and yet I've barely sat down and have a proper meal with them. I'm actually thinking of getting a PDA now so I can be more mobile and have a proper and effective calendar.

My current timetable is proving to be harder than I thought.
On Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays, I pretty much work all day from 10:30 to 4:00pm. My uni days are only on Tuesdays and Thursdays (yes, you can start throwing your cans at me and start booing now). On Thursdays I have a full day of classes from 10:00 till 4:15pm, and on Tuesdays I only have one hour of classes. I choose to spend the rest of my Tuesday in uni anyway to study and do my homework (which I'm beginning to realise now may not be enough).
Don't ask me about my weekends. I don't need to justify my weekends.

I know this is the holidays now. I'm thankful for the weekend and now the week.
But sometime last week, I imploded. Not in a messy and angry way. I just decided to stuff it all for a bit and went out at about 1am. By myself.
A slow drive. Some loud and soft music. And my camera. Nothing big. Just the city.

It's amazing how static the city can be at about 2am on the weekday. It can be as hectic as hell for a moment and the next, as if acting like a whole, full organism, everybody in it decide to call it a night - collectively - leaving the city barren and quiet. Life would cease, and you could stand just right there in the middle of the street and be amazed at how the laws of the day become irrelevant. The rush. The phone-rings. The conversations. The traffic. The noise. The busyness of it all.
They simply ceased.

And here, I found my thoughts again. I breathed in the bigness of the world. Marveled at the lights.
And went home to sleep.

Woke up this morning to a text message from Joseph.
Earlier at around 2:15am, Ethan Choo was born into this world.

It felt like a crime, walking into that ward without a camera. Taking that photo with my phone deserves an even heavier punishment. But holding him close while he was asleep was rewarding enough. I didn't dare at first. The whole "support the baby's head" deal was too complicated for post-teen depressed me (joke). But they insisted that I did and so joe took him out of his crib and handed the little boy to me.

New life. In my arms.

It's an amazing day.
The world is beautiful yet again.

I'm in love.
Meet Carla Bruni.
Her voice is music without the music itself. Her accent is the cherry to the drink.
And oh, is she so fine.

The website itself is so pretty and simple I'm melting. (Yes, that was a geeky thing to say).

But did I mention that she's French?
Mmmm.