I am contemplating if I should just allow my thoughts spill over carelessly and not be afraid of what consequences I will have to bear. Of course I don't think I will EVER reach that point. Then again I might. HAHAHAHA. Hmm.. Anyways, I'm in so much pain cause I have 3 ulcers strategically placed and a sore gum from a growing wisdom tooth. You do NOT want to evoke my anger. Pain. So much pain. I wish I could just numb it and let it heal...Teehee...'
I stuffed up something was ready to face the accusing finger of the supervisor. I was at LaTrobe today doing some assay for my project. Didn't realise that I loaded the wrong samples in and we only had enough for me to run 36 samples so I had no chance of saving my mistake. We calculated it in a way where we have almost just the right amount of solution. But somehow miraculously we left one bottle of solution untouched without knowing it. So slightly after I realised my mistake and was already planning the explaination, someone pointed out that there was a WHOLE bottle of solution that was untouched and whoever wanted to run more samples could. I stood there in shock. One of those...haaa.....moments where you know God's taking good care of you and He won't test you beyond what you can bear. HAha. It's been a while...:P
Anyhows, I am really sleepy. Apparently I talk nonsense when I'm tired. hehehe.
Fry egg and egg come from chicken backside and Chicken eat sand.....Teehee
~sigh
Feeling a bit homesick*
I'll either be running around like a headless chicken finishing up my FINAL Thesis to hand in. Or, I would've been so confident and handed it in already. I hope for the later. Dateline, 12pm, Friday 27th October. Gosh. I can't wait and I also wish I had more time. But...freeeeedom!!!! Insert pompom holding smiley*
I really shouldn't be chatting online or surfing the web for recipes online. Oh btw, I destress by searching for cakes to bake and recipes to get inspiration for my next dinner. Hmm. Anyway, I'm still awake at an insane hour cause I'm partly bothered by a certain someone who's been an ass lately. Oh maybe it's the person's character but it all kind of surfaced again today. So, I can't take some people's personality but then again neither do I expect people to take mine. So I avoid and shy away from those that I can't stand. At least for a while until I can reconcile in my head and heart and learn to extend grace as it has been freely given to me.
Hmm. I can't help that I get very easily bothered when I read/hear/observe people's behaviour or response to something in a way that I don't agree in although it is none of my business. Like today, I read a friend's blog and one of her previous entries mentioned about how someone from her church saw her blog and spoke to some leader and the leader approached her. Some of the contents on her blog about her relationship wasn't 'good material' for people to read. So she was told to either edit them or take it off the blog completely. I think I nearly wanted to scream at the computer screen.
Anyways, I shan't go into details about how I feel cause I'd be able to write an essay. Some people are being such a paaaain and I need to sleep. Why do I always fret over such events. Haaaih.
Uni has been super overwhelming. SIGH. I had a great weekend but when Sunday night came, I started to feel so depressed. Anyways, let's talk about the good stuff ei. Friday was syok! For once in a looooong time we didn't have jam (phew*). Really needed the break. So a few of us decided to have a barbie and surprise Doreen. We started the grill and threw on some chicken wings and sausages but had to pack up soon cause it was too dark and windy. So, went back indoors and resorted to good ol' oven and fry pan. The long awaited relax without worrying about waking up early the next day to go in and feed the rats. They're long gone by now. Part of me feels weird not having that responsibility but it's GREAT not needing to plan my time for the weekends for it. WOOHOO!
On the not so good stuff
I've been sick. For the 3rd time in...1 ish months?? Can't remember. I'm coughing my lungs out. Blehh..Bad for voice but what to do. I cannot tahan if i don't cough lar...
I'm stressed. Seriously. I look at how much I have to do and when my due dates are, I can sit and cry. Still I'm bloggin. Maybe cause it's still 'lunch' time and I came in early today cause I didn't have to wait for the toilet. Sleepy sleepy. Post lunch tiredness. LAddiiididaaaaaa...
I feel so random. Just want to run around and dance so I don't have to worry about uni. HAIIIH!
I love Monday nights =D Elmo has a cute burp. Burp*
Mou-mou...>_<
Bwahahaha.
Ok, back to work...
Hmm. Feeling a huge blue cloud over me right now. I'm so going to feel sudden emptiness come Friday. SIGH. The remaining of my rats are going to be put down tomorrow. SOB* First weekend in 4 months and 3 days that I don't have to go in and feed them. I'll feel so ...erm...duno* Haha.
I'm starting to feel the stress already. But I'm still blogging. Haih. Just wanted to blah it all out so I don't bottle it inside and explode. Poof*
Had a shit Monday cause the Bomb Calorimetry machine died on me and I did 10 samples that didn't produce data =( Now I gota go all the way back to LaTrobe and finish it off. Hopefully i do get to finish it.
And doesn't help that at the end of a shit day, you decide to act all righteous on me and give me your advice on being compassionate. Don't jump to conclusions before you scold people ok! "So dumb" was refering to the situation and the irony of it, not the person. Of course it's a sad situation at all, but I just found it bizarre. So sue me! I hope you're proud of yourself for the comments that you made. Cause I looked at it and laughed at how you over-reacted. Seriously, I found it funny that you had the guts to write what you did, even after the over-reaction. Not worth my reply. What's the big fuss, I don't even get it.
So, I met this other crazy woman on Tuesday. I found this incident, REALLY funny. It started on Friday when I filled out a booking sheet for a room for Tuesday. And I saw this booking that was cancelled. I thought I'd double check with the guys who were in charge if the room was booked. They both said, just write your name down cause she clearly cancelled her name out. So when Tuesday came, I prepared everything in the room and this woman, tinier that me, walks straight in. I was stressed up to my neck so I said to her, "Excuse me, I've booked the room for today already. Check the sheet." And she just went nuts, saying that she had booked it and blah. So I refered her to the guys in charge. He explained that she had cancelled it and that he'd tried to call her but couldn't reach her. Then suddenly, like something snapped, she just kept repeating, "Why didn't you email me, Why didn't you email me. Email me...Why didn't you email me...". On and on. And she threatened to throw her rats into the bin if she didn't get the room. WOOOOAHHHH! Psycho! Freaky. Science fanatic! Omg. I don't wana do phd, after become like her!!!! At the end, I decided, just let her use the stupid room, after her poor rats get thrown out for no reason. HAHA. Weir-do. And after getting the room and doing her work for a while, she just walked out again and said to the guys in charge, "You hate me right, You all hate me right? You hate me". Then she goes off and does her work. WHAT THE? WEIR-DOOOOHHH!
Ok, this is a really long entry. HAHA. Too bad lar. I've had a weird week =P Really weird week. Yet somehow I find it amusing that people and react so weirdly.
Another one of those 'sigh' entries. I haven't been getting much sleep the past few days. Partly because of my hectic schedule. And also the stress level is rising. I doze off and find myself in the zone where I'm half asleep but still conscious. Every part of me just wants to zoom off to lalaland. But every time I almost fall asleep this nasty thought just comes into my mind. The stress, worry, whatever you want to call this ugly green-eyed monster reaches the conscious side of my mind and sets off a whole string of thoughts that leads to more worry and stress. So, I end up waking up. I give up! So....torturing!=(
Gawd. I don't know. Maybe everything's kind of snowballing. I don't know how to write up my discussion. Haven't got my results. Don't know nuts about stats. Haven't got a clue about my intro or methods. Ar. Die! (insert sooky face). Of course some parts of me wonder why He's lead me to walk this road. It's too tough! Much more than I can bear. I just want to give up!!! Honours sucks! It's this long lonely road where no one really understands. Even the close people seem to pretend to understand but don't seem to be half as interested in whatever shit i'm in. Haha. Anyways, don't leave comments like 'i understand...or chill man, relax lar'. Cause I find it hard to not be cynical anymore. haha. Maybe I'm just fed up of cliche, meaningless, try hard emphatic comments. Like Kg would say it, "Oh, Save it!" Haha. Sounds a bit harsh.
Oh well...
I'm ok. Just stressed. Need to get past that. I'll get over it. I'll be ok. Meantime, let me sookandsulk all i want. Sighhhhhh! Don't bother me/challenge me/nudge me/intimidate me/poke fun at me. I am in no frame of mind to be gracious to you if you step on my toe. I'm stressed* Of course, that's not including the few people I want to meet up with still. (gracey! Quick, we need to meet!) =(